prior to the last week, the last time I had sex with anyone was when I gave some guy a blow job back in january. after this, I had absolutely no symptoms of anything whatsoever through the most stressful, fucked up months of my life.
dad's newfound heart condition delayed grandpa's funeral until my midterms, which I couldn't study for because my laptop died, but that's ok because the next day there was a double murder at my school and professors understood everyone was too busy weeping to write papers anyway. after my room mate was done cheating on his boyfriend with my crush (and his bf's room mate) on my couch, in my shower, and within earshot of my bed, he went insane and got a restraining order from their other room mate :D happy world! so I transfered to nursing school where I had to pass one exam each week on subjects like "how to insert a foley catheter" with a 100%. fortunately for the general public, 90% is a failing grade in nursing school and gets you kicked out of the program with no refund. sometime during the month and a half of constant testing I found out my father had signed the petition that turned into the law against gay adoption I had just spent months fighting against. I'm gay, and because people like my father signed that petition, it's now illegal in my home state to adopt or foster if you even have a non-married person living in the same household as you. in a state with 8000 unplaced foster children, its the best law EVER! I found out while he was presiding over my uncle's marriage to his mistress :D his shiny new heart condition prevents the slightest discussion of this...so I just quietly broke out in hives across my arms and legs and practiced injecting tomatos with fake insulin and changing dressings on cantaloupes with imaginary pus-filled wounds.
so absolutely no symptoms of STD anything, but when I moved to massachusetts last month the change in humidity has my lips chapped regularly and I've had cold sores twice. the second time I was an idiot and popped the cold sore, which left a horrible scab, which I covered in lavender oil after my room mate suggested it. apparently lavender oil is a skin irritant as well as an antiseptic.
I'm a month out of the bible belt with my first serious repeat-cuddle buddy/soon-maybe-boyfriend and I thought this cold sore was completely gone (finally, after like, two weeks). on friday I spent the night at his place and we made out on and off for roughly 12 hours, during which time I also gave him a blowjob. I thought the popped cold sore of doom had gone away completely before friday, but I just spent last night with him, and he asked me about the small slightly pink spot it left, and then didn't want to kiss me after I admitted it was a cold sore. ("had been a cold sore" would probably have been closer to the truth.) he was, at least, still very huggy, or I would've been completely fucked emotionally. I don't get why he didn't care friday, and the fact he did last night is fucking with my brain. I would never knowingly expose him (or anyone) to anything serious.
I assumed it was just like when you pop a zit and get an infection, but after he didn't want to kiss me (it is seriously slight, I really have no idea how he noticed - not that I tried to hide it) I'm now paranoid. he is kiss-and-cuddle obsessed and I really don't think he would've had me over all night after a long day and a 9am meeting the next morning just to make some lame excuse, so I'm assuming he's really worried I could be contagious.
is there any way at all to distinguish between HSV-1 and HSV-2? I've never had anything remotely resembling a genital outbreak, never treated a cold sore with anything more than chapstick...anybody else ever had a significant other not want to kiss because of a cold sore? if this is just the same virus I've had since I was a kid, can it really cause serious infection in someone else? should I be treating it with something more than this medicated chapstick or is he being unreasonable or neither or both or what?